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Happy Father’s Day…I Hope Yours Wasn’t Hijacked

HFD MomFriends,

I had a wonderful Father’s Day with my family sharing & laughing over a meal. I also am very blessed to have such wonderful memories of my own father Leroy, who passed away nearly four years ago. There is never a day that goes by when I don’t think of him, but today is especially nostalgic for me. As I wish all of the fathers out there a very happy day – their day, I must briefly respond to those women, namely some single mothers, who think it’s OK to hijack this holiday from men. I shared this on Facebook & I stand by it:

I have really had it with some women trying to hijack Father’s Day just because you had children with an irresponsible man & he is absentee. Let the men have their ONE day ladies. Women are not fathers nor can they be. Women aren’t female versions of men (or vice-versa).You are a woman, a mother doing the best you can and/or a phenomenal job in the absence of your children’s father. Unless some of you ladies have suddenly grown male sex organs & therefore know what it’s like to be a man, stop it with the “I’m Mom and Dad” nonsense, that’s impossible. Just be happy with YOUR day which we celebrated last month…sheesh! The irony is that you never hear single fathers wishing themselves a happy Mother’s Day…#howmuchattentiondoyouneed

 

This debate over single mothers declaring themselves as “both Mom & Dad” boils down to two sides – those who believe that parental roles are gender restrictive, and those who expand that to define it merely as anyone who fulfills the role in question, whether they are male or female. Obviously, I am in the former group. People who believe that it’s OK to wish single mothers “Happy Father’s Day” (or men “Happy Mother’s Day”) have succumb to this underlying missive from some in America, to neutralize gender, and this goes against humanity itself, which is equally dependent on procreation, therefore, both genders. This is an anti-humanity position as far as I’m concerned but I digress. The great irony of those of the latter persuasion, is that many of them were raised in single parent homes, and though they make the claim that “Mom is my Dad” or “Dad is my Mom” – there is still an underlying feeling that “something is missing”. This is usually the case when boys are raised by a single mother or daughters are raised by a single Dad, if the parent was not wise enough to seek help in co-rearing the child with someone of the opposite gender. Some have done this & their children are better for it and I am not speaking of such parents. If a single parent is fulfilling both roles as adequately as proponents of gender-neutral parenting claim, then there should be zero complaints or lamenting regarding the missing gender! You cannot celebrate your parent for fulfilling both roles and in the same breath complain that you did not have the other. It doesn’t work that way. As someone inevitably retorted to me on Facebook:

“While I do not support legalized same-sex marriage, I also recognize that in many homes gender alone does not define the role of mother and father.What about same-sex couples who are raising children, and each parent fulfills a different gender role?”

The answer is that in such households where the parents are of the same gender, only one role is being fulfilled but personalities & methods can be different. Gender is not something that can just be turned off or on like a light bulb in the same person, although some have tried. If children are being reared by two men then they have two fathers to honor on Father’s Day. Two lesbians raising children together mean that there are two mothers. Period. In any case, all I’m saying to the single Moms (because you pretty much never hear a single father declaring that he is both & should be honored as such) is that both genders have a day, stop hijacking Father’s Day from the men…

 

Until next time! God Bless!

 
2 Comments

Posted by on June 15, 2014 in Philosophy, Society, Uncategorized

 

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Right vs Left & The Black Community; Today’s Musings

Friends,

I know I’ve been away for several weeks and haven’t posted, because, as I shared weeks ago, I am steadily writing & working hard to meet deadlines for my upcoming novel, THE ELEMENTS. Today I had the opportunity to dialogue with other local black conservatives & I wanted to share my thoughts with you all (as I shared them on Facebook), so here goes:

I was speaking to a small group of local black Conservatives on a conference call today & we spoke about several topics, including race in America. We were speaking about some of the ills of the black community including the crime rates, the greater need in some communities for economic empowerment & other things like awareness on screening for things like HIV, breast/prostrate cancer…etc. Frustratingly (to me & one other) the conversation devolved to liberal bashing – specifically black liberal/Democrat bashing on the part of some, not all. It is so ironic to me that some black conservatives engage in this sort of thing constantly when the topic of race comes up & I saw a lot of that during the #Zimmerman trial & the year preceding it. 

Some will declare, “I’m just American, no need to identify racially” – I say to each his or her own in that regard & I’m certainly not the cultural police. These same people who make such statements will make a point on their blogs/websites & any media forum they are involved in to present themselves as a “black Conservative”. In other words, they self-identify by race when it’s convenient for them or will get them noticed more. They want to stand out & let’s face it, black conservatives on some level are treated like celebrities on the right. We are praised for standing out/up & going against the grain. Some love the notoriety that comes along with this in the black community, yet bash liberals for “always bringing up race” or identifying by race. 

We all (as far as I can tell) identify as black conservatives on the right (myself included) for different reasons or by instinct but until some start identifying only as conservative, race notwithstanding, I’ve had enough of their black liberal/Democrat bashing & admonishing when it comes to this topic, when many of us do the same things we accuse them of – right-wing style. I’m a lot of things, but I don’t bash blacks on the left to appease ANYONE, nor gain attention – I attack policies & ideology as I see fit & that’s why my liberal friends & I can have #calmversations. We debate but in a civil manner & I just wish there was more unity within the black community between black people on the left & right. One day, we’ll get there. I have hope.

Everyone have a safe, productive & wonderful weekend, be blessed!

 
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Posted by on October 4, 2013 in Philosophy, Politics, Society

 

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Never Give Up!

Friends,

Consevative Libertarian blogger Talitha McEachin

Consevative libertarian blogger Talitha McEachin

I had been praying that I would find work to help supplement my income and I found a job, even though it wasn’t my first pick but I’m just not one to turn down any honest work – that’s not who I am, thank God. Picky workers starve. However, I had sent my resume to a company about two months ago but shortly after they put a freeze on hiring, so I pressed on with what I had been given.

Last Monday, one of the managers of that same company had called me & left a voicemail message asking that I come in for an interview that coming Wednesday and to call to confirm that I could make it. Well, for some odd reason, even though I use my phone everyday & check my voicemail daily, I never got the message….until last night. I had to take the battery out & when I put it back in I got an alert that I had a voicemail. I checked it & lo and behold, I listened to that message to me asking me to come in for the interview…from a week ago. I was so mad at myself, the phone, the world because I’m thinking “how could I have missed it” & the world must be against me, AND I’m trying to decide if I’ll even call them back because it’s been eight days since the message was left.

I was mad, discouraged & really self-defeated. How could I miss the call for the job which I really have wanted & had prayed for! So, I get out of my slump this morning because that’s unproductive. I prayed about it & decided to call the manager today. I explained that I had not even received his message & asked if the position had been filled, in my mind thinking that it HAD to have been filled in this economy, with Georgia’s unemployment rate being so high – no way could someone NOT have been hired.

Well, it had NOT been filled. The manager said that he was hoping I’d call back to confirm because I had the most experience of all of the other resumes they had received so far. He also wasn’t going to hunt me down either & had done his part by extending the interview opportunity. He had thought that I must have procured other employment or ignored the message, but didn’t have the etiquette to either call to decline or accept. He was puzzled by the disparity between the accolades received by my references & my lack of a response. They did interview others but no one really stood out yet. Four people confirmed the interview but didn’t show up. So guess where I’m going tomorrow morning? the interview bright & early – (gotta go to bed tonight, no late night Facebooking for me, writing or anything else). I don’t know if I’ll be hired, but I would not have this opportunity, had I just accepted defeat. All I needed was a chance to shine & I will. Be encouraged. Never give up/in!

“Do you not know that those who run in a race all run, but one receives the prize? Run in such a way that you may obtain it.” – I Cor. 9:24

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.” – Joshua 1:9

 
2 Comments

Posted by on July 23, 2013 in Philosophy, Religion, Uncategorized

 

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Today’s Introspection & An Excerpt from THE ELEMENTS

Friends,

Consevative Libertarian blogger Talitha McEachin

Conservative libertarian writer Talitha McEachin

In light of all of the drama after the Zimmerman verdict and talks about race & racism, I wanted to share my thoughts from my Facebook page today, because this philosophy is at the heart of my reasoning for writing my current epic fantasy series:

“I will say this – that the racists of America, of all colors, are starting to realize, that they don’t have as many allies in the general population as they thought or once had…I can feel it & it’s a great thing. Racism concerns me deeply because I want the best for us as human beings, and it’s inextricably bound to some economic problems we have. We cannot progress as a species until we learn that we’re more alike than we are different.” 

And now here’s an excerpt from Book I of THE ELEMENTS (Chapter Six), Enjoy!

“Kgosi’s plan of attack is foolish,”

“What do you mean? The Lungi prophesy says that the Kishnu will begin to follow the Lungi way. My uncle is only pretending to fulfill this to take back our lands. He says their land belongs to our people and they drove us into the caves long ago – Ajuoga you have taught this yourself. It is a good plan,”

“Is it a good plan or is it foolish? There are gods – there are those before us. The Lungi believe this too. They say that their god gave a word that our people would come to him, after a war which the Lungi will win. Is this not the very thing Kgosi is doing? Does it matter that he does this with intent? He still does it Phenyo. There are better ways to have war than mocking a man’s god. We should let the Lungi be. Everything that we need is plentiful here, the land is good to us. We want for nothing. Kgosi is a fool of the worst kind – he spills the blood of our sons to show his power. His war is not with Nkosana, it is with the god of Nkosana. It would be better if he aimed his spear at the one whom he can see. Men are not suited for wars with the unseen,”

“That is why I want to lead a group of women there instead Ajuoga.I would like your blessing and a muthi for this journey,”

“You ask for my blessing and I will ask those before us for this, for you. You ask for my muthi and I will make a special one for you to drink. You will ask Kgosi to give this duty to you, and he will fill your ears with laughter,”

“I will show him that mine is a better way,”

“The women in Kishnuizwe have always been warriors in some form or another and you are the best – as good as most men and better than some, but Kgosi thinks too much of men Phenyo.Victory in war he preserves for men,”

“I want to ask the she-god myself …I believe she will give me the power to bend my uncle’s will to mine on this matter Ajuoga,”

“I have been waiting for you to ask for proof of the she-god Phenyo…so long have I waited for you to believe. Now you have at last asked to see her, though your asking comes wearing the cloak of disbelief,”

”If I did not believe there was a she-god -” Ajuoga stood and leaned over to touch Phenyo’s face and her hand felt for her nose then moved down to her lips. Using the tip of her thumb and the finger next to it she pulled a little at Phenyo’s lips and held them tightly, as if one more utterance would summon a known terror. Her next words were frightened, whispered caveats and she let go of Phenyo’s lips before she spoke them.

“No, No….No Phenyo! She gives us words only for truth. She does not protect those who use them for lies. You know this daughter. We speak only of what we do or will do or what is – never if I did or did not. There is a she-god or there is not!”

“There is,” said Phenyo, visibly startled

“I believe. I want to see her,” she continued. She may as well go along with it. Although Ajuoga seemed willing to show her the she-god, she had decided long ago, that no matter how obviously a figment of her mind, she would behave as though she were real. It was the respectful thing to do.

“Good! Now that you have asked you shall see daughter of mine. Will you lend me your eyes?…will you tell me what you see? I want to know of her face – again…the she-god. I want to know of her beauty! My eyes….my eyes….I only have eyes in my sleep! There was a time when my eyes could see…long ago…I was still a girl. The she-god came to me then but I did not believe! I saw her with my eyes and she took them with her when she left me Phenyo – she took my eyes! I refused to believe but I was only a girl. Will you be my eyes Phenyo? I want to see her face again!”

Ajuoga trembled as she rubbed her hands together. Her words rushed into one another in desperation then were slow, like a procession of beasts running with all their might, slowing down for a cliff ahead and slamming into one another’s flesh. For the first time Phenyo felt afraid in her company but reached for Ajuoga’s leathery face with courage and wiped away the tears with her fingers. Ajuoga seemed more like a stranger with remnants of familiarity to her now.

“Yes mother…from where will she come?”

“Shhh…only believe what you can see…daughter. Believe what you see,” Ajuoga stood slowly and spread her arms – the left one towards the ceiling and the other perpendicular to it. Though closed, her eyes shone a dull white through the lids and escaped between her lashes at the bottom, like rays of a partially eclipsed sun. The arch in her back straightened itself triumphantly against the rush of wind that flew into the dwelling, past Phenyo, then orbited both women. Ajuoga’s hair rose and fell as Phenyo’s neatly woven hair withstood the wind. Dust and small pieces of debris danced. Phenyo stood but wanted badly to abandon her flesh standing there, allowing herself to escape invisibly, unable to be followed or seen. Shiluba could be heard outside scurrying about and making high-pitched pleas. If the winds didn’t calm soon, the chimpanzee would seek comfort in the heights of the trees away from the izindlu.

“Ajuoga?”

“You are Phen-yo,”

“Yes…are you from those before us?”

“Phenyo…you are a fine woman indeed. I see why she loves you so,”

“You are the she-god?”

“Yes,”

“What have you done with mother’s tongue?”

“She is here still – and has not been harmed,”

“What do you want of me?”

“I did not summon you Phenyo. What do you desire of me?”

“What is your name?”

“You wanted to know my name? How can a she-god help you?”

“I didn’t believe,”

“I know – she knows. I told her you would not believe until you could see,”

“Whose blood belongs to you?”

“No Phenyo, I am not an ancestor of the Kishnu, the Kishnu are of me,”

“Then you are -”

“Phenyo, do you believe?”

“No,”

“Will you believe?”

“Yes,”

Copyright 2012 All Rights Reserved by TK McEachin.
 
4 Comments

Posted by on July 22, 2013 in Fictional Writing, Philosophy, Society

 

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I’m Not A “Cookie-Cutter” Conservative

Consevative Libertarian blogger Talitha McEachin

Talitha McEachin

I get messages & comments throughout social media (and email) fairly often, from people questioning the authenticity of my Christian faith, conservatism, my cultural tie to the black community or my level of empathy for issues related to gender. This is usually due to an opinion I have given, which is not in agreement with the consensus or, which is in agreement with someone I’m supposed to automatically oppose no matter what (as if anyone other than me will decide this). I normally only respond to public accusations & ignore the private messages sent most of the time, depending on how they are expressed. I’m not special or alone, most of us bloggers/writers with any level of an audience or followers experience this. I objectively look at things & I make up my own mind and try my best to do so without all of the biases that I may have, and we all have them – it takes effort & forethought to be objective. All I can do is be me, be honest & give my assessments as I see things, or muzzle myself when I feel there aren’t enough facts or there is too much gray area to draw a conclusion. With that said, folks, I’m not a “cookie-cutter” conservative, Christian, woman, Southerner or black woman, so stop expecting me to be.

If I disagree with the majority in any demographic I belong to, I’m going to say so freely & respectfully and I could care less who gets upset about that. That doesn’t make me any less of any of those things I named. Sometimes I agree with liberals, disagree with conservatives, stand up for men, admonish women, agree with the perspectives of other black people & other times I disagree strongly. Plenty of times I’ve agreed with the perspective of white Americans (skin color doesn’t determine veracity for me). I have defended Muslims from vitriol. If you find that you disagree with any majority in your personal demographics it’s OK….the earth will still spin on it’s axis. These people don’t sleep next to you, they don’t feed you or keep a roof over your head. If hard times come to you, they aren’t the ones you will call upon for help. Do not allow the “herd” to force you to go along to get along – speak your mind. Stand up for what’s right (no pun intended) based on your convictions because YOU have to live with your actions or failure to act, no one else…think about it.

Rant over…have a blessed & productive day!

 
 

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Walter Myers III: The LGBT Movement and the Pursuit of Ends

Walter Myers III

Walter Myers III

The problem, in my view, with the LGBT movement is not that they have a particular view they are advocating for, but the manner in which they pursue it. Regardless of whether I agree with their ends, which I don’t, I could at least respect them if they didn’t have to demonize the church or anyone else that doesn’t agree with them. There is something to be said for being gracious when you’re fighting for a cause, and the LGBT movement scores a big goose egg in that department.  The odd thing is that they make a moral argument to justify their ends, while rejecting any contrary moral arguments. We see this clearly in that they constantly denigrate Christian values, while saying that their values are superior. But how can they do this? They say their values are “progressive” values that have evolved over time culturally, but what exactly are progressive values? On what are they based? Christian values are based on thousands of years of history and observation of natural law, and were validated by the resurrection of Christ. Now many may argue that they don’t believe Christ resurrected, but they cannot argue the historical accuracy of Christianity, and they cannot deny that Christian values, when properly applied, promote love, patience, hope, perseverance, and tolerance of others with whom they disagree. So while the Christian has a set of timeless principles to work from, the LGBT movement has no objective basis on which to moralize. So why should anyone listen to them? Demonizing those who disagree with you and seeking government to force people to accept your point of view is hardly a sustainable moral ethic.

I know the rejoinder from someone in the LGBT community will be that Christians are filled with hate and discriminate against gays. But that couldn’t be further from the truth. Christians are called to love and accept all human beings, and simply see the gay lifestyle as being one of many different sinful lifestyles. But Christians don’t seek to ban gays from living their chosen lifestyles, and don’t see their sin as any worse than premarital sex amongst heterosexual couples or adultery. These are all forms of sexual sin and I don’t see any Christians clamoring for laws that prevent consenting adults from entering into whatever relationships they wish to enter, even if they are wrong (which they obviously are in the case of adultery). They say that Christians are against “gay rights.” But Christians are not against “gay rights.” This is because “gay rights” are not any different from the rights of any other human being. We all have the same rights in this country by virtue of being human. So I don’t see anything special about being gay. If you’re gay, then you’re a human, and it doesn’t make you any different than anyone else. The LGBT movement would have us believe gays are somehow different and special, but I don’t see how they can rationally justify that. Being gay has no affect on one’s ability to get a job, love who they want, or live the life of their choosing. There simply is no broad or systematic discrimination today against gays any more than there is against blacks.

To continue reading, please click HERE.

 

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Father’s Day Introspection…

Consevative Libertarian blogger Talitha McEachin

Consevative Libertarian blogger Talitha McEachin

One of the things I’ve noticed between the two holidays designated to honor parents, is that too many greetings toward men are more often phrased in a condescending way. Each year I see things like “Happy Father’s Day to the men who are taking care of their kids/doing what they are supposed to be doing/sticking around for their kids/not out in the streets/setting an example/not out there making babies everywhere…etc” – In other words it is more often phrased in the form of what a good father is not doing, and I think that’s a sad state of affairs. This is further exacerbated by greetings directed towards women on this day as well. Women aren’t fathers, so I find that especially silly. A woman who wishes mothers a “Happy Father’s Day, diminishes the role of men and in effect, attempts to render the institution gender-neutral – whether deliberately or out of ignorance. Excuse my candor, but being a father requires a penis, and if you were not born with one, you’re incapable of being a father.

I don’t understand why some cannot honor the institution of fatherhood without indirectly (or directly) reflecting father's daynegative images & stereotypes of men. I don’t know about you all, but I had a wonderful father who was very loving, affectionate, wise, a disciplinarian – his good qualities far outweighed any negative ones. I know some of you either didn’t have your Dad in your life or didn’t know him but just once, I wish those individuals would focus on the institution of fatherhood and honor it, instead of keeping the negative father/male images in the forefront of their greetings to men in general & the ones in their lives. After all, those who were not raised by a Dad, should understand (in some ways more) how important the institution of fatherhood is, having had it absent from their lives. I just don’t see this disdain on Mother’s Day, as if all mothers are good ones. Happy Father’s Day to all of the men who are fathers – with no strings attached. I appreciate you. I appreciate the institution of fatherhood. May God Bless you!

Psalm 103:13 
As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him.

 
3 Comments

Posted by on June 16, 2013 in Philosophy, Society

 

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